The science behind the sass
Every feature in your kit maps to published research on breakup recovery. Here's the short version.
Thinking about the bad stuff (on purpose) lowers lingering love
Deliberately reflecting on an ex's negative qualities reduced feelings of love for them. It also slightly lowered mood, so we always pair it with something good about you.
Langeslag & Sanchez (2018), Journal of Experimental Psychology: General
Finding silver linings reduces distress
People who wrote about positive aspects of their breakup reported less distress over the following days.
Slotter & colleagues, Villanova University
Rebuilding 'who am I without them' drives recovery
Breakups blur your sense of self. Reflecting on the breakup in a structured way improved self concept clarity, which in turn improved wellbeing.
Larson & Sbarra (2015), Social Psychological and Personality Science; Slotter, Gardner & Finkel (2010)
Unstructured venting can backfire
Raw emotional writing right after a separation made some people feel worse. Structure is the difference: reframing, questions, small actions.
Sbarra et al. (2013), Clinical Psychological Science
Self compassion speeds things up
People who spoke about their separation with more self compassion recovered faster over the following months.
Sbarra, Smith & Mehl (2012), Psychological Science
Heartbreak looks like withdrawal in the brain
Looking at a rejecting ex activated reward and craving regions associated with addiction. Cravings come in waves and pass.
Fisher et al. (2010), Journal of Neurophysiology
Believing in your treatment helps
Recently heartbroken people who received a placebo they believed would help reported less emotional pain. Rituals matter.
Koban et al. (2017), Journal of Neuroscience
Not a substitute for therapy. If you've felt stuck for weeks, a licensed therapist can help a lot.
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